Tuesday, January 27, 2009

Fantasy short term HC candidates and bailouts

If the University wants to make a "splash" nationally with this next hire, here's a list of 5... uh 6 current and former successful HCs they should call.

1) Bobby Knight- his name alone would bring fans to Coleman. His players will hustle, play fundamentally sound basketball, and the best part... we'd be all over the media.

2) Nolan Richardson- imagine 40 minutes of hell in Tuscaloosa. We have the athletes to make it work.

3) PJ Carlisimo- he took Seton Hall to the '89 title game with a mediocre squad and bought and paid for an Aussie 3 point shooting machine.

4) Bill Laimbeer- we can say we hired a coach from a professional league! Yes it's the WNBA, but someone pays them to play so there. Dirty picks, rough play = RATINGS BABEE!

5) Digger Phelps- he beat UCLA a hundred years ago! Just think of the ESPN coverage we'd get by bringing him in. He can bring in Jay Bilas and Hubert Davis as assistants.

6) Bobby Cremins- want a pipeline to NYC talent? He's your man... just don't question how he got them. He'd bring in a tough minded guard or 2 for sure.

Bailout
Since everyone and their mother is asking for government assistance I think the state of Alabama should hit the government up for $50 million for basketball. It's a far better plan than "bailing out" the banks that foolishly lent money to people who couldn't afford it. Here's my state of Alabama stimulus plan:

1) Give 80% of the money to Alabama and Auburn. Divvy the rest between UAB and the other minor schools.

2) Each university has to transfer that money to their basketball program. The easiest way is to buy up unsold tickets.

3) Designate game days for different types of customers. Have a "family day" when tickets are comped for families... meaning parent(s)/child(ren). Another day can be termed "hook up night" where single people are let in free.

4) The extra people at the games will buy more concessions which offsets the ticket prices. Talk about a local way to stimulate the economy! This would help Auburn rid themselves of the curtain and the upper bowels of Coleman Coliseum would actually have people up there.

Not to get political, but these government bailouts are really getting on my nerves. Businesses that don't do business the right way should go under and not be propped up by government. Businesses that sell products the consumer don't want should fail... not be given more money to build more products people don't want.

No comments: